After waiting impatiently in line behind dozens of people at the pharmacy to refill my prescription, I discretely leaned in toward the clerk and whispered.
"Do you have pregnancy tests?" I asked softly.
"No. The pregnancy tests are in the upstairs pharmacy," the woman belted back at me, as if she was making an announcement to all of the clients in the pharmacy.
Instead of going upstairs, I ran straight to the parking lot, feeling mortified. I decided to make one more attempt to retrieve a test. I stopped at Safe Way and went to the family planning and oral hygene aisle. First I picked out several bottles of tooth paste and a new toothbrush. Then I walked over to the pregnancy tests, took a breath, looked both ways to make sure there were no familiar faces around me and grabbed a test. I sandwiched the test between the oral products and I was on my way back to work. Rather than waiting until the end of the day to take the test, I decided to just get it out of the way. I carried my entire purse to the bathroom with the pregger test inside of it, peed on it and waited. I didn't buy the test that had a subtle plus or minus sign. No, to the contrary, I bought the test that had a big YES or No so there'd be no confusion in the matter. Thirty seconds later, I looked down and saw a big 'YES' looking back at me. I was trembling with nervousness. Not knowing what to do, I went straight to my office, closed the door and began sobbing uncontrollably. I called my sister and she began talking about how excited she was and what a blessing this was. Although it was a blessing and I would come to think of it as a blessing, in that moment, I just needed to be told that everything was going to be ok. I had to figure out how I'd tell my Catholic parents, how to survive in my Catholic-affiliated work place as an un-wed, pregnant woman, and then I'd be able to think of it as a blessing.
I had already planned to visit my significant other after work, because I had both of his phone chargers and without them, he had no way to use his phone. This meant, however, that it would take me more than eight hours to be able to share the news with him. When I finally got to his place, he was fixing dinner and pouring wine for his roommate, himself and me. I stopped him.
"I'm not feeling like having any wine today. I'll have water instead," I explained.
The three of us sat in the living room, nibbling on salmon. I sipped my hot water as my boyfriend and his roomie sipped their wine. Then, when his roomie went to the bathroom and the two of us were left alone in the living room, the news came.
"How are you? How come you aren't having wine today? You feeling ok?" he asked.
I looked at him, but could say nothing. He knew.
"This is new life content, baby," he said. "We'll be alright."
And, with that, the journey began. It has been filled with ups, downs, highs, lows, excitement, terrifying moments, and hope. If you're a free spirited couple or single person in your late twenties or early thirties and you find yourself expecting when you weren't planning to be expecting this blog is especially you. If you're a friend, a relative of someone who fits that category or are simply looking for some entertainment, this blog is for you too:-).
What to do when you weren't expecting to be expecting.
1. Breath. Everything will be ok. You will get through this one way or another.
2. Reflect. Is having a child a viable option for you? Do you want to be a parent? If you answered 'yes' to those questions, you can find a way to make it happen. Nine months is longer than you realize.
3. Let yourself cry. It doesn't matter how old you are or how ready you thought you'd be when you got to this moment, you're here now and it's likely different than you imagined it to be. On top of that, there are crazy hormones raging through your body, heightening every emotion that you experience.
4. Talk to your significant other. If you're lucky enough to be in a stable relationship when you get into this situation, communicate with each other and explore ways for surviving. Worry less about cementing a plan for the future and more about getting through each day at this point.
5. Find a support system. It might be better to rely on friends at this early stage in the game. Our friends, our chosen family, are often more in line with our adult choices in life than our family members. If you feel safe and supported with family members, go ahead and choose one to confide in. If you're not ready to tell your parents, but you have a close relationship with your sibling and can trust him/her to keep your news confidential, go for it. The key is that this is your life and you have the right to share your news at your own pace, in a manner that feels safe to you.
I had already planned to visit my significant other after work, because I had both of his phone chargers and without them, he had no way to use his phone. This meant, however, that it would take me more than eight hours to be able to share the news with him. When I finally got to his place, he was fixing dinner and pouring wine for his roommate, himself and me. I stopped him.
"I'm not feeling like having any wine today. I'll have water instead," I explained.
The three of us sat in the living room, nibbling on salmon. I sipped my hot water as my boyfriend and his roomie sipped their wine. Then, when his roomie went to the bathroom and the two of us were left alone in the living room, the news came.
"How are you? How come you aren't having wine today? You feeling ok?" he asked.
I looked at him, but could say nothing. He knew.
"This is new life content, baby," he said. "We'll be alright."
And, with that, the journey began. It has been filled with ups, downs, highs, lows, excitement, terrifying moments, and hope. If you're a free spirited couple or single person in your late twenties or early thirties and you find yourself expecting when you weren't planning to be expecting this blog is especially you. If you're a friend, a relative of someone who fits that category or are simply looking for some entertainment, this blog is for you too:-).
What to do when you weren't expecting to be expecting.
1. Breath. Everything will be ok. You will get through this one way or another.
2. Reflect. Is having a child a viable option for you? Do you want to be a parent? If you answered 'yes' to those questions, you can find a way to make it happen. Nine months is longer than you realize.
3. Let yourself cry. It doesn't matter how old you are or how ready you thought you'd be when you got to this moment, you're here now and it's likely different than you imagined it to be. On top of that, there are crazy hormones raging through your body, heightening every emotion that you experience.
4. Talk to your significant other. If you're lucky enough to be in a stable relationship when you get into this situation, communicate with each other and explore ways for surviving. Worry less about cementing a plan for the future and more about getting through each day at this point.
5. Find a support system. It might be better to rely on friends at this early stage in the game. Our friends, our chosen family, are often more in line with our adult choices in life than our family members. If you feel safe and supported with family members, go ahead and choose one to confide in. If you're not ready to tell your parents, but you have a close relationship with your sibling and can trust him/her to keep your news confidential, go for it. The key is that this is your life and you have the right to share your news at your own pace, in a manner that feels safe to you.
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